


Not a Good Idea

by Highlander_II



Category: Van Helsing (2004)
Genre: M/M, Plants Make Them Do It
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-07
Updated: 2012-03-07
Packaged: 2017-11-01 14:36:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/357932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Highlander_II/pseuds/Highlander_II
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There was a walk, there were plants, that's pretty much it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not a Good Idea

**Author's Note:**

> This one's all sherrineko's fault! 
> 
> It's sort of part of a pseudo-series of fics I've been toying with that are nowhere near ready for posting, but this one was a one-off.

This was a bad idea. Not the mission - though even that was debatable this time - but this shortcut through a small wooded area. Woods aren't an issue, but something about this path seemed too easy. Too simple. We both thought so, but we must've been far too tired to argue the point. So, we walked.

Now, we're sitting in this clearing, staring at each other, trying not to do or say anything of a 'provocative' nature. And by 'provocative', I mean 'sexually influential'. I've been wanting to jump him since we sat down.

While this normally isn't an issue, this is not the best location for such things. Though he might not readily agree - the heathen. Honestly, under normal circumstances, I might enjoy such intimate undertakings in such a location, but as I feel we are being unduly influenced by our surroundings, I'd rather not take any chances.

He continues to argue that it's no different than our 'rutting' in my chambers. To which I must remind him that, as true as that may be, it is not sufficient reason to 'rut' out in the open. And I begin to question my decision to train him so thoroughly.

Not getting into that now. I have more pressing matters. Like him stalking across the clearing toward me.

I raise a hand to keep him at arm's length, but it doesn't do much good. I even try to order him down, but that only results in him kneeling before me with his nose in my crotch. Again, this is typically quite pleasant, but the current circumstances are quite the deterrent.

I grab at his hair to pull him away, but when he looks at me, his eyes are so dark, so full that there is very little resistance left in me. I wonder if I look as crazed as he in this situation. Dear Lord, help us both.

I do try quite hard to determine the best approach, only to find myself throwing him to the ground on his hands and knees, bent over a large boulder (that seems suspiciously placed for just such a thing) and thrusting myself into him. Obviously the rational part of my brain didn't get the notification quickly enough to insist this was a bad idea. By this point, it's irrelevant anyway as we are currently engaged in activities that would have us both punished by the Order if they were at all aware.

Believe me, it's not that I dislike any of these things that we were doing - of course I cannot be expected to carry on any sort of dialog, internal or otherwise, while I was engaged in such ~~pleasurable~~ activities - but that we should confine such things to locations that won't serve to have us jailed or worse. And, at the time, we had no way of knowing that we were under the influence of some toxin or other.

It wasn't until after we had returned to the lab that I was able to study the flora of the clearing more closely and determine that there was some intoxicating substance that had infected us both. I don't entirely understand why ~~fucking~~ engaging in intercourse in the woods would alleviate such a condition, but it, at the very least, cleared our heads enough to convince us to quickly depart the location in question.

Van Helsing was thorough enough to take note of the location on a crude map so that we might ~~visit again when we feel the need for mindless sex~~ avoid the place at all costs. The map itself is labeled in a code only Van Helsing and I know to prevent the rest of the Order from discovering things such as this, which would lead to any amount of questions and missions to destroy the place. Not that it should be left to the unsuspecting, as it is quite dangerous, but that the Order's response would be akin to 'burn it down' and that is rather unacceptable to either of us. ~~Not the least of which is because we both feel a strange 'force' trying to draw us back there.~~

I will need to concoct an antidote or anti-toxin so that we might pass through unaffected should the need arise, but also to reduce the effects of the toxin, should we decide to venture there of our own accord. Purely for scientific study, of course.

In the meantime, I will do my best to ensure Van Helsing doesn't suggest - and by 'suggest' of course I mean 'convince' - that we travel there any time in the near future. He has important missions to attend to and I need to ensure he is well-equipped for them.

Now, where did I leave that test tube of the flora toxin...


End file.
